Chapter 1.12-One of Those Whackos

When we last left our Great Heroine Lottie Nott she had tried her hand at parenting Quadruplets before abandoning it to her wayward husband Captain Douche Bag, had a face painting mishap, and wished to get a new tattoo. We rejoin Lottie as she leaves the Spa after getting her new paisley ink.

 

-What do you mean 'Paisley?' I asked for something scary!
The scary part is I made it.
-AAAAAAAAaaaaahhhh!
Oh it's not that bad. If you really want to be scared take a look behind you at the thinking bicycle. Seems it studied a little too hard last night also.

Lottie- AAAAAAAaaaaahahahahahaha. A studying bicycle. What a riot!
Whatever Lottie. Wait a second, where are you going?
-I'm going to go play in the ocean!
In the- Oh not again!

Lottie, it's like 47* outside there! The leaves are half off of the trees! Winter is coming!
-I look hot in my bathing suit don't I?
Lottie, that water can't be too much above freezing. You'll catch your death!
-And the ocean is so pretty in the light of the setting sun!

-LALALAlaladeeda! Bah DadadanaNADunDun! (Loooooooooverboy!)
Oh Lottie. Let's go check on the kids shall we?

Oh look. Captain Douche Bag is holding Cash while Paige screams her head off. Enjoy CDB. You deserve this you know?

Mysteriously hearing her daughter's cries from across town Lottie rushes home to scare her even further.
-Aaaactually...
Yes Lottie?
-I got cold.
Ah ha. It's a little late in the year for such antics huh?
-yes.
Just don't do it again. And let Captain Douche Bag take care of the kids for now. You go sleep.
-Uh, sleep. Yeah, no. No. Definitely no.
Because that makes great sense- Wait you changed back to your everyday and you're running to...

Stick your head through the wall??? Lottie I know you think you're a lot of things, but you're not a linebacker. Get out of the toilet please.
-Stupid morning sickness. Why won't it stick to mornings?
Because life is never that simple dear.

-Aw, man. This blows.
Sorry dearie.
-Could you, could you just leave me alone for a minute? Maybe go focus on Sherman?
Certainly dearie. Anything to torture Sherman. And what's this? Oh this wish should be fun! Wish granted.
-Wait a second... what did you just do?

I just bought you a little helper Lottie. That's all. And anyway, your dear, dear, husband wished for it.

Oh Sherman!
-I see I'm not Captain Douche Bag anymore.
Only for this moment. Here dearie, take this.

-Uh, Thanks I guess?
Oh you're quite welcome my dearest Sherman.
-What is it?
The key to unlocking your latest wish. All you have to do is give it a shake.
-Like this?
Exactly like that.
-I just got goosebumps. You're being entirely too nice.
Oh, nice has nothing to do with it. Enjoy your wish!

-Wait a second! What was that! Lottie's in bed and I swear I just heard something upstairs!
Yes. Yes, you most likely did Sherman. Oh look! One of your children looks like he needs attention. Off you go. Off you go! Go and take care of poor poor Flynn. And Sherman?
-You're really creeping my out.
Yes. Yes. Enjoy Sherman.

-Daddy's coming Flynn, Daddy's-

-Coming very quickly! Daddy's getting away from the skeleton!!!!
*snickers! Ah, this should be great fun.

*wish for Bonehilda- Check!

-Why didn't I realize? Why didn't I know? A skeleton! Is that, is that the door to the bathroom opening again? What if she comes in here? What if...

-She's here isn't she? Oh my Watcher, she's in here with me!

-AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!
LOL. Oh Sherman! I might just be able to put up with you now! But poor Flynn still needs someone to feed him! Sherman! Come and be a good Daddy!

-Oh okay, I'm coming. At least I know that thing will be in there, I'll be able to... *gasp! No! NO! NOOO!!!!!

-Is he going to do that every time?
Yes. Yes he is Bonehilda.
-That's going to get annoying.
Maybe to you perhaps. I just call it vengeance divine.

-It's not like I'm even dusty. I'm not am I?
No. You're not dusty. But I probably do need to get him in here to take care of Flynn, oh and there goes Paige.
Sherman- It's for the kids, it's for the kids, it's for the kids...

Bonehilda- Hiya chicken!
Sherman- *gag. AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhhhh!
See? You can have fun with it to Boney.
Bonehilda- Guess I can. Might as well.

Sherman- Oh not you again! *gag
Bonehilda, nice job just standing there while he runs again. But really, you probably better vamoose so someone who can take care of the kids can.

Bonehilda- But it's such a wonderful feeling of empowerment!
I know, but there are three screaming kids now.
Bonehilda-Look Flynn! I can vanquish the evil villain with my bare bones!
*eye roll. Nice Boney.

Lottie finally arrives on the scene to give her kids the motive boosts they so desperately need while Bonehilda thinks how tiring it is that Sherman refuses to even be in the same room with her despite his being the one to wish to have her in the first place.
Also, This took place over a couple of days while I experimented with Bonehida in CAS which is why her apron color keeps changing. None of my changes would stick darn it. But Lottie finally decides enough is enough and again wishes to chat with Sherman.

Lottie had just changed into her maternity wear when she cornered him.
Lottie- Sherman?
Sherman- Wide eyed, fearful lest Bonehilda appear suddenly. The living female has stopped me.
Lottie- Oh cut that out. You are not traumatized by the skeletal maid you hired. Not to that degree at least. And that's why we need to talk. I'm pregnant. So you're going to have to pick up some of the slack you've been dropping since we got Bonehilda. I can't do it all you know.
Sherman- Bonehilda!!! AAAAAAAaaaaahhhhh!
Lottie- Dammit.
I agree Lottie. I agree.


*wish to chat with Sherman- Check!

Lottie? I know that conversation with Sherman didn't go quite as you'd hoped, but who are you making the drinks for?
-Myself.
Yourself?
Lottie...

-Mmmmmmm! Nice and stiff.
You're pregnant Lottie!
-And? I'm also overworked with the four I've got upstairs. Not to mention another on the way. I deserve a break.

Lottie your last pregnancy you inhaled a lot of paint fumes and I'm worried enough about the four that you already have. But now to add drinks to the mix with a new pregnancy?
-Paint fumes? Gosh I'd forgotten about that. I want to paint a wall mural. That ought to ensure I get some more fumes.


*wish to paint a wall mural- sadly- Check.

-*chortling. You know what you sound like? You sound like one of those whackos who think woohooing while pregnant is harmful. Hahahahaha! You're so funny!
Lottie, I am NOT one of those freaks. Drinks and paint fumes are harmful to a growing-
-BWAAAahahahahaha! Drinks and paint fumes! Harmful! Oh Maker. You're so funny sometimes in what you believe!
And you're the one who believes in me so HA! Just stay away from the coffee okay? Maybe we can ensure-

-Oooooh, you're right. I need a coffee. I'm so tired! At least that'll wake me up.
*headdesk. Oh Lottie, sometimes you really make me wonder.
-What's that supposed to mean?

-Wait a second? What was that notification?
Oh nothing. Just that Sherman and I need to have a little talk about the twins his mistress just bore
him: Woodrow and Victoria.
-Oh ok. So long as it's nothing big. Whoa... speaking of big, I've got a sudden urge to go grab one of my kids and plop it down on the ground. Must... Must do it!

Which she promptly does. Since neither Sherman or Lottie rolled a wish to throw a party the kids aged up on their own on the floor. First up is Paige- to keep track of them easier I put Paige in Purple.

Flynn is next. He's got Lottie's coloring, though I do Not remember making Lottie's roots that dark. Odd.

Samantha is next. I put her in Sage with a pink tutu. Though I shouldn't have bothered with using color to keep track of the girls. They look very different.

Cash is last to get the magic sparkles. He's, uh, a little special and it takes him a while to uncross his eyes. And while Samantha and Cash play with their special dollies what are Paige and Flynn up to?

Paige- Nicely done Flynn. Let the other two play with their dollies on their own. Where did you get that bottle from?
Flynn- I'm a genius. It's magic for me.
Paige- Cool.

We'll end our night here with a heavily pregnant Lottie surveying the 4 toddlers she's now responsible for.
Lottie- You know what I need?
What do you need Lottie?
-Woohoo. G'night.
Nighty night Lottie. Nighty night.
So! Join us next time as we see just how well juggling 4 toddlers goes!